Mommy Guilt?!

I stole this post from my other blog and felt it was appropriate for my "mommy" blog...

Grayson 14mo. 

I'm not sure where to begin today, I just feel the urge to write.  There's so much on my mind this evening.  It's been almost a year since I last wrote a posting and so much has happened.  To start, my little man, is no longer a tiny infant, instead he has become a willful, comical little boy.  He has just entered toddler-hood and it has been one of the greatest journeys watching him transform to this independent little person.  Before my son was born, I feel it would have been impossible for someone to explain to me exactly how rewarding and satisfying it is to be a mother. I find the greatest joy in just a single hug or snuggle and my heart beams in his accomplishments & developments... no matter how insignificant, no matter how huge.  I am so proud of him & I want him to be proud of me.

 I often wonder if I'm doing this whole parenting thing right.  I can drive myself crazy questioning if  I should have done this or that differently. Constantly comparing my mothering abilities to those of others. Why is it that there are "all these moms" able to make daily homemade educational crafts and gourmet meals and I can barely muster to energy...or time...to make mac-and-cheese?! Does it make me a terrible mother that I am just now starting my son's 1st year memory book?! That on occasion I've become irritated and an unpleasant mommy and that usually on more than one night, we eat leftovers?  I will barrage myself with thoughts like, "if I would have only spent my time playing on the floor with little man instead of doing the dishes", etc.  At some point, enough is enough. There comes a time when it's necessary to put some things into perspective.  I'm sure I'm not the only mother who finds herself in the throws of comparisons & I know I won't be the last.  But what makes a good mother, a good parent?  Things like educational activities and delicious meals are positive things for our children to experience, but are they truly the core of what is important? Are they the determining factors in our idea of quality parenting? 

I reflect on how I handle my son and what qualities I want to be deep-seated in him when he grows up.

Love (the hugs, the kisses and the discipline) and Foundation

Love the Lord your God with all your soul, and with all your heart and and with all your mind. (Matt. 22:37)



 First and foremost I want him to truly understand how loved he is, by us (his parents) and most of all by the Lord. We love because he first loved us. (1 John 4:19)  He is adored and cherished and there is nothing I quite enjoy like showing this to him with affectionate hugs, kisses and attention. But, I also try to express that love with discipline and teaching, because it is our responsibility as parents to guide our children and to show them the way....even when it's hard, even when they refuse to listen, and even when we just don't have the energy. After all, we are the biggest influence in our children's lives, raising them up to have all the skills needed to be fantastic adults! When I fall short and feel like I've dropped the parenting ball, I take a time out to soak in the fact that God's love for me and his love for my son is so indescribable, that any lapse of judgment or rashness on my part is covered by love. It's a huge weight off my shoulders knowing that He forgives my shortcomings and that I can start anew!  Teaching my son to love the Lord and others unconditionally and to readily extend forgiveness has more importance than I can articulate. Once my son is older, it will be important for him to see that Mommy and Daddy make mistakes, that they don't always handle things appropriately and that children aren't the only ones who need a little mercy and a lot of grace! 

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8).

 God is love and love forms the perfect foundation for my son to be firmly fixed in as he matures.  I want him to go through life knowing that he's got a compass, a friend and a light to help guide him through life.  I desire for him to understand, that no matter what he chooses to do or where he plans to go, we will always love him and will will never turn our back on him. 

Being a good parent is all about loving, encouraging and supporting your child!  I need a reminder occasionally, like many moms. Let's face it, all of us are super-moms. I don't know any terrific mother that hasn't sacrificed hours of sleep & "me" time along with  hot meals & hot showers just so that her child can thrive. So they can have everything she can give!